“Your expectations, more than anything else in life, determine your reality. When it comes to achieving your goals, if you don’t believe you’ll succeed, you won’t.” This according to an article by Forbes, that goes on to explain that people who believe in themselves actually have more brainpower at their disposal. Read their article on unrealistic expectations that will ruin you, here.
When expectations are dished outwards and on others, they tend to damage. With an outward focus on expectations, we run the risk of trying to force people into the boxes we have created for them and miss seeing them for who they are.
When we define our own expectations, we set the standards for ourselves and this has a positive effect on how we relate to others.
To understand how we can use expectations and a belief in ourselves to our advantage, 99FM’s MYD Heart spoke to inspirational speaker and employee engagement expert, Lynne Fraser.
“To have an expectation is to have a strong belief that something will happen.” says Lynne who explains that there is danger in outwardly focused expectations because our beliefs exist in our own minds. Lynne adds, “We are continually trying to achieve the expectations others have of us. Very often we too, levy out expectations of others and hope that it will be delivered in ways we expect.” Says Lynne.
Expectations, while harmful used as a yardstick for others, can be empowering if used on ourselves. “To understand the power held in expectations is to turn it inward and only expect the very best of you. This gives us the ability to propel our lives in the direction that bring us great joy and prosperity.” Says Lynne.
Lynne’s guide for expectations :
- Always expect the best of yourself, knowing that only good is coming your way. To know that you are doing your best regardless of the circumstance you might face gives you strength to continue as you generate hope and belief that good will happen.
- Throw away expectations you have of others. They are not you, they have their own interpretation of what is good for them. Consider how often you have expected someone to do or behave in a certain manner only to be let down and disappointed.
- Act without expectation. Lao Tzu says when we let go of expectation we are opening up the opportunity to see the world in a different way. When we act without expectation we allow ourselves to experience life just as it is and not according to the stories held within our minds.
Get in touch with Lynne Fraser through her website, here